2026 Draft — Drunks doing drunk things because they're drunks

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Drunks doing drunk things because they're drunks walks away from this draft with a B-minus, and honestly, Nate, that grade is being held up by one man: Jeremiyah Love at 1.01 — consensus rank one, taken at one, clean as a board room handshake, no notes. After that it is a slow-motion reach festival. Chris Bell eight slots early, Kaelon Black twelve slots early — Roger has reviewed the tape and it looks like Nate drafted with a Magic 8-Ball that was only showing "All Signs Point to Reach." The lone bright spot past round one is Oscar Delp sneaking in at 3.01 — a C-plus, sure, but tight ends with that profile are assets, and seven slots of value at that stage of the draft is at least a defensible line item on the league office's spreadsheet. Bottom line: Nate built his draft around a perfect first pick and then spent the next four rounds slowly returning all the goodwill. The 49ers have conditioned him to believe a strong start is enough — it is not, Nathan.